Saturday, August 11, 2018
Yolkfellows
Romans 15:1 (NIV 1984)
We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.
Today, when we speak of the 12 disciples, we instinctively think of them as a homogeneous unit of exemplary men to be admired and emulated. Nothing could be further from the truth. They were flawed men from different backgrounds who Jesus was moulding into the foundation for His church.
Over time, each of their weaknesses was exposed but Jesus taught them, supported them and ensured that they grew individually and came together as a team. Their mistakes were open before each other and the Holy Spirit preserved that record that those mistakes are open before us now so that we could learn from them.
For us now, things are structured differently. We know the reality that is our lives, but many of us, for the sheer purpose of maintaining our image, live in denial of our weaknesses and failures. The outward persona is well manicured and curated while there is a different reality behind the veil.
I know this reality personally. I know what it is like to keep my weaknesses and failures undercover. I know what it is like to walk around and not have anyone think that I am just like them, that I have unmet needs, or have been pressured by lust and temptation. I know what it is like to have things fall apart and to walk around like I have it all together.
As a Christian leader, there is pressure to appear to be perfect, to be living above struggle, above temptation, above sickness, above lack and above many of the things that are common to others around us. There are two common consequences of this, the first is that we hide our reality and our frailties and the second is that, as a result of the first, we are unable to get help if we stumble.
Paul wrote to the Galatians and established a standard for brotherly conduct that is needed among believers and among their leaders. “Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:1,2.
Here Paul opens up the possibility that we could at times be overtaken in a trespass, in other words, we could fall into sin. In the face of that eventuality, there is a need for restoration and that is the responsibility of those who are spiritual. It is also necessary that those carrying out the restoration be gentle, mindful that they too could fall into sin.
This is all well and good except for one thing, if we are pretending that all is well how would someone know that the brother has fallen into sin. Many ministers fall and hurt themselves because they are walking alone and confiding in no one, or because there is no one close enough who could challenge them or to whom they are accountable.
There is a very well known and well-used passage in James’ letter. In James 5:13-18 we get the direction to call on the elders of the church when we are sick so that they could anoint us with oil and pray for our healing. Then we get the declaration about how the fervent prayer of the righteous can accomplish much. In this, we are given the example of Elijah.
What is often missed in this section is the need for a relationship between and among believers that facilitates this prayer one for another. James wrote, “Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.” James 5:16.
I have often pondered this matter of confession to another as a basis of prayer for each other that leads to healing and restoration. It struck me after a while that confession requires a relationship. Where there is no relationship there is hardly likely to be confession because we tend to not just walk up to strangers and tell them what we did last night.
The Roman Catholic, Anglican and some other churches of that tradition, tried to solve this problem with the confession box or confessional. A place where the priest is hidden behind a curtain as the person makes a confession to him in order to receive prayer. There is no basis for this in the New Testament and we are therefore to confess our faults one to another.
Nearly two decades ago, a group of friends started a men’s group we called the Yolkfellows. We had grand ideas of becoming the local Guyana version of the American Promise Keepers. We organised camps and the like and invited men we knew from across the Christian community. We had big dreams but failed miserably. But four of us have remained friends and brothers across all that time. We are a motley crew if there ever was one, each hard to get along with. But there is a brutal honesty before each other that neither of us would live without.
If there is a sin to be confessed by one of us, then the other three of us become the confessional. Invariably someone is very harsh with the sinner, one seeks balance and the other seeks to restore gently recognising that any one of us could easily fall into sin.
Think on these things:
- Do you have relationships with other Christians where you could be brutally honest about what is in your heart and mind?
- When last have you or one of your peers confessed something or asked for help and prayer support for something that is troubling, or potentially embarrassing if it got out?
- What does your church deliberately do to help spawn small groups and build stronger relationships among members, especially for new believers who do not have established friendships in the church?
Prayer focus:
Let us pray today that we would be available to others and build mutually beneficial relationships in the kingdom to support each other.
In His Grace
Pastor Alex